It is coming. I am not imagining the beast. It is real. I expect it any minute. It is near. It is getting closer and closer. I try to deny its existence. If I know it is there 100% of the time my stress level will grow and get bigger and bigger. I don’t know how to deal with it. I don’t know how to act in a detached manner, as if it did not bother me. To me, it is a monster, all black, big, a lot bigger than I am. It can destroy with the snap of a finger.