Something nice–I want something nice. Or something sharp–either one is fine. I need something, whatever, to kill the pain. I want to wake up and feel nothing. I want wake up and not remember where I am or what I have become. I don’t like the me of right now. I hate being. I hate living in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of nothing. I want my life back, the life I trust. I grew up with that life. The life now means nothing to me. It is absolutely worthless.