Posts Tagged ‘Lauchita’

Think

August 11, 2017

Think

It is a defense mechanism. Today is another anniversary of the day I lost you. I think, I remember, but then I stop. I don’t want to know. I don’t want it visible, for my heart to stare at. You will never be again. Your little head won’t be next to mine when I wake up in the morning. My hands will not caress your little body. I will see you with my mind and with my memories. There are so many memories of you and me together, being a little family!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Apt. Dreaming

January 21, 2009

Wednesday, January 21, 2009: Each and every time I seean ad for rentals or an apt. for sale, I fantasize that Lauchita and I will be able to live in one of them. I see us in an apt. with a view of the East or Hudson River. An apt. all to ourselves,with its own kitchenand bathroom–nothing shared anymore.

Apartment Dreaming

January 21, 2009

Wednesday, January 21, 2009: I cannot help it and suppresing it is a useless endeavor. Each and every time I see and ad on the subway, an ad anywhere, about anapt. for rent and/or sale, I fantasize that I have the money to go out and get one for Lauchita and me. Then I see us living in a place with a view of either the East or Hudson–or, Central Park. Lauchita and I used to hang out in the park a lot this past summer when the weather was super hot. It’d be great to visit it again and be just steps away from it.

Not Leave

December 12, 2008

Friday, December 12, 2008: I don’t want to leave. This is a nice, comfortable home in Park Slope and I wish it were mine and Lauchita’s. But it isn’t and Saturday I will go back to Williamsburgh. On with the bags again.

Lost Starbucks Moment

December 2, 2008

The second thing that worried me yesterday is an incident that happened when I went to the Starbucks on 51st between Park and Madison. That used to be my home. A couple of people recognized me, said hi. One of them even asked how Lauchita was. Then, Eric, the manager, brushed past me while I was seated by the door. I was deep in thought and didn’t recognize who he was until somebody spoke to him and he answered something like: I’m good. He looked at me, and didn’t say hello. Maybe he saw how worried I was and didn’t want to disturb me. But the whole thing made me sad. Eric was so kind to us when we’d sit there for hours and hours in the afternoon!

 

Dead End

November 17, 2008

Monday, November 17, 2008: My life seems to be at a dead end. I am deeply discouraged about my future and I think about what is to become of me and Lauchita all the time, all the time. Where will we be a month from now, two months from now? Why do I know what I want, but don’t know how to get it?

Sleepless IRS Night

September 16, 2008

Tuesday, September 16, 2008: I could not close my eyes last night. Lauchita, my little cat, stayed next to me on the bed and comforted me without knowing why she was comforting me. The IRS letter. That’s all I could think about. That is the main thing on my mind and will be until this is resolved. I don’t like to do this, but I am asking for donations. This is a very stressful time in my life and I need to move on with my life.

Swinging Tail

July 31, 2008

Thursday, July 31, 2008: She was angry about something. She didn’t like the way things were going. Lauchita swung her little tail up and down and sideways. Do this? Do that? Run to Fifth Avenue again and act like she owned it? What to do? She kept swinging her tail and wouldn’t hold still.

Lexington Avenue

July 30, 2008

Tuesday, July 30, 2008: This time she decided to take a little stroll down Lexington. Lauchita and her parrot green dog/cat leash pushed their way out of the carrier and just went to check out the neighborhood. She looked happyas can be while I stressed. Then, on Madison, she meowed her way into an ATM machine.

Shower Odyssey

July 28, 2008

Monday, hJuly 27, 2008: I woke up at 4:30 A.M. to walk all theay to pen Door on W. 41st and 9th Avenue. Shower hour starts at 6 A.. What I didn’t cunt on was that the fist woman to take the shower would monopolize the bathroom and not want to leave. It was 6:45 when somebody told me that lauchita, my little cat, had somehow escaped the carrier. I rushed outside and, sure enough, the carrier was empty. Then I looked towards 9th Avenue and she was about to cross it. That’s not your cat, aoman told me. Yes, she is, I said. That is not your cat, she repeated. I grabbed Lau owever I could and she held on to me for dear life. What did she want, that mischivious animal–to become the Quen of Hell’s Kitchen? She almost did.